From adopted sister Bebbie, on relationships, feelings, sharing, and Patriarchy

I can't think of anything more tumultuous than being in one place, while you strive to move away, let go of a "home" -- be that "home" a place, a person, or your own current identity. It is tough, tough, tough - sometimes heartbreaking. It is the labor pain of birthing the next Sherry, and you know more than I do about labor pains. You seem to be asking yourself the same Q's I do... "I can't feel who I once was, so... who WAS that woman? If I feel so many tears now, was I masking my emotions THEN? What IS the nature of peace?" I too am confused... but I see it this way -- here's a quote from a favorite OM article:

"When you bare yourself to another, you are giving them the gift of you and showing them that they also matter. In letting yourself be witnessed, you are letting others into your intimate space, stepping into the sacred container they have created for you."

This is how WE are, Sherry -- take relationships seriously, feel deeply committed, give it all we've got and crave to be treated with Reverence. Naturally, we suffer a great deal when we're ABLE to be seen / acknowledged / witnessed by the person who counts... but then we're met with blank stares, tight lips or worse, harsh rejection. This is dead wrong -- literally dead -- NO relationship is happening, it's all a one-way street like a perversion of The Golden Rule: The man with the gold makes the rules. That's what I call Patriarchy, and it's what hurts us.